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[J-197] News and Saws 消息与格言
A person and a parson were friends. They both liked acrostics. Once, for some blackmail the person was sent to jail. When the parson went to visit him, the person asked, “Do you have any north, east, west, south?” The parson answered, “No, I have only spring, autumn, winter, summer.” The person then said, “Give me air, fire, earth, water.” The parson finally gave him these statements: Audacious cowboys ride on stallions to impel cattle; kindness inspires love lacking selfishness; truth is mere emptiness.
[译注]
某人与某牧师是朋友。他们都喜欢「离合诗句」。有一次，为了某勒索事件，那人被送进监牢。当牧师去看他时，那人问说：「你有北、东、西、南吗？」那牧师回答：「不，我只有春、秋、冬、夏。」那人于是说：「给我气、火、土、水。」那牧师最后给他这几句话：大胆的牛仔骑上公马要赶牛；仁慈启发爱心不带自私；真理真象只是空洞。
注：1. acrostic: 离合诗句 (把诗句中某固定位置的字或字母，如每行第一字，或每字第一个字母，集合起来形成的话语) 。本笑话中，四方位的 “north, east, west, south” ，集其首字母便成 “news” 。四季的 “spring, autumn, winter, summer” 形成 “saws” 。西方人所谓的「四要素」 (the four elements) “air, fire, earth, water” 形成 “a few”。而文中最后三句话形成 “Acrostic kills time” (离合诗句消磨时间)。 2. saw: 格言。 parson: 教区牧师。 blackmail: 敲诈，勒索。 impel: 推动、驱赶。 truth: 真理、真象。
[复习填充]
A person and a p_____ were friends. They both liked a_____. Once, for some b_____ the person was sent to jail. When the parson went to visit him, the person asked, “Do you have any north, east, west, ____?” The parson answered, “No, I have only spring, autumn, winter, _____.” The person then said, “Give me air, fire, earth, _____.” The parson finally gave him these statements: A____ cowboys ride on s_____ to impel cattle; kindness in_____ love lacking selfishness; truth is mere e______.
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